Cause And Effect

At the age of 14, I was adamantly against smoking. My father smoked and I thought it was disgusting. I remember always being upset that he would have enough money to buy cigarettes, but never enough to buy me the things I wanted or even needed, like new shoes. My sister and I continually hounded him to quit smoking, but he never did. I hated smoking by the time I hit my teenage years and swore I would never light a cigarette, even for a million dollars. Then, my friends came over one day and revealed to me that they had started smoking and what could I do?

In fifth grade we watched a video about a person who had lung cancer. They showed his lungs and told us how much he smoked. He had to talk through one of those voice box things that he held up to his neck and made him sound like a robot. It was not enough that I already hated my father for smoking all the time and throwing money away, but now I hated him for what he was doing to himself and our family. At that point I swore I would never ever smoke. This affirmation came to me daily until one day when I was 14 and my friends came over to get me so we could go to our regular hangout.

We rode our bikes through town to a small culvert, climbed down to the edge of the creek and before I noticed what was going on, two of my childhood friends were lighting up Camel Lights. I was in complete shock! I asked, "What are you doing?!" The coy reply from one, "We smoke now." As if smoking was like switching from Coke to Pepsi... "Oh, I like Pepsi now, no big deal." But, alas, I was only 14 and the forces behind peer pressure are exactly as have been warned. I was roped in. Choking my way through my first pack, I had to be cool like them, but I made it to a full-fledged addiction in no time. Soon, I was stealing smokes from my dad and money from my sister to buy my own.

I left for college a smoker, lived in the dorms as a smoker, and met new friends as a smoker. Soon though, I realized how poor college students are and I remembered how much I hated my father for spending all of his money on the nasty things. I decided to add up how much I had been spending on cigarettes just over a month's time. At $4.35 a pack, one pack per day, two packs on stressful or going out days, I was spending $130 a month and $1,773.60 a year! I did not eve have a car that I could depend on and I was spending the same amount of a small car lease, on cigarettes! After adding that up, I decided I was done smoking, for good.

Going cold turkey was my first choice in quitting. First, rounded up all my cigarettes, lighters and ash trays and threw them out. Next, I cleaned my whole room to remove any lingering smells and I washed all my laundry. I would have cleaned out my car, but because I spent all my money on smoking, I could not afford one and did not have one to clean. I was ready!

Because I decided to just up and quit without any help, I ended up having a lot of anxiety, depression and headaches. I made it two days before I could no longer endure the severe headache I had been suffering. I literally begged my neighbor for a smoke. Even after only two days of being smoke free, lighting that cigarette attacked my healing lungs and I coughed profusely until I vomited. Walking out of the bathroom from this traumatic event, I saw a commercial for Stand.org. The site claimed they had ways to help people quit smoking. I had no other choice. I had to quit and it had to work. I needed a car, I needed to be healthy again.

I went back to my room and connected to the site. Their first suggestion was to seek the help of a physician. Because I am not from here, I had