Dead

Dead

Sometimes you just feel dead. I feel dead, or at least as dead as a person who's never been dead can feel. I don't know what dead feels like, but this is as good as it gets. Dead to me is emotionless. I am emotionless. I can look at the people around me, and not care one bit. The sad part is that's the only thing that saddens me.

I can sit here, at the computer, aimlessly typing, even though I know that at least one of the six people I'm close to is crying. I could probably name the one or ones that are crying too. Yet, I still sit here. I don't try to call them and tell them what they mean to me. I don't call them and tell them, "Hey, everything will be alright." I don't try because I don't care.

I know what I do care about though. I care about the fact that my mother is in the kitchen, and my stomach is grumbling. That saddens me too. When I eat, there's a 50% chance that the food I consume will not stay in my body long. It's a shame to spend time to do something, that will only stay with you for so long. Yet still, I feel and hear the growls of my stomach, and I smell the aromas of curly fries and sloppy joes, and I can't stop my mouth from watering. So much for wasting time.

You know what else is sad? It's sad that when I get up to go to school in the morning, I only go to please myself. It used to be different. I used to try to find something to make someone happy during the day. Now I make myself happy. Of course, that's not working as I planned. I'm just dead. I guess I have the happy people curse. You know what happy people are. They are those people that are obnoxiously happy and optimistic, unless someone around them is sad. Then they are sad until they can fix it to the best of their ablity. I'm a happy person. I was a happy person. I'm a dead person.

I guess I'm a contradictory dead person that can read, write, and type. It's ironic, like the song. No, that has nothing to do with this...I know, but hey, I'm dead. I have that right, right? Do the dead have rights? If so, I'd like a list. I want someone to list me out my rights, so