Holden'S Hardships

In J. D Salinger's novel, The Catcher in the Rye, the protagonist, Holden, goes through many hardships in his journey to self-knowledge. In the beginning, Holden has to deal with being kicked out of school and not having any place to call home. He is also struggling with the unfortunate tragedy of the death of his beloved younger brother Allie. At the same time, Holden is trying to deal with growing up and accepting the adult world. Throughout the novel Salinger addresses the conflicts faced by a young man struggling with the trials and tribulations of growing up while also confronting personal loss and loneliness along the way.

In the beginning of the novel the reader learns that Holden has been kicked out of his school Pency-Prep. Holden talks about how he has been kicked out of schools in the past and says, "They gave me frequent warnings to start applying myself... but I didn't do it. So I got the ax"(4). This shows that Holden doesn't really care about school, it is not all that important to him. In fact, he decides to leave school early, a few days before Christmas break begins saying that, "I just didn't want to hang around anymore. It made me too sad and lonesome"(51). Holden clearly doesn't feel like he belongs at Percy and he doesn't seem too upset about having to leave either. However, when he does leave Holden isn't ready to go home yet. Stating I "decided I'd take a room in a hotel in New York...and just take it easy till Wednesday"(51). The fact that Holden isn't going home is a sign that he doesn't really feel like he belongs there any more than he feels he belongs at Percy. Holden doesn't really have anywhere to go, not even a friend's house. Most teenage boys who were running away from school because they flunked out and didn't want to face their parents just yet would very likely choose to retreat to a good friend's house for a few days. But Holden doesn't have many friends other than his little sister Phoebe. Holden has to deal with not only being once again kicked out of school but also not having any place to go when he leaves. It is clear early on that Salinger depicts Holden as a loner and an outsider with nowhere to go.

Along with having to cope with being kicked out of school and having no place to go Holden is also struggling to come to terms with the death of his younger brother Allie. He thinks of Allie and how much he admired him all the time. "He's dead now", Holden said, "He got leukemia and died... He was terrifically intelligent"(38). Even though Allie was two years younger than Holden, he obviously admired Allie very much and is having a difficult time dealing with his death. He even mentions how he "Broke all the God-damned windows with my fist, just for the hell of it"(39), the night that Allie had passed away. Holden had no other way of coping with his brother's death when it happened and it still haunts him. He finds himself thinking about Allie late one night after sending a prostitute out of his hotel room. He is bothered by the fact that he sent the girl away and "What I did, I started talking, sort of out loud, to Allie. I do that sometimes when I get very depressed" (98). Holden is clearly upset and thinking about Allie. He is also at this point in the novel feeling guilty for a time when he wouldn't let Allie join him and his friend on a bike ride. He says that Allie didn't get upset about it but it bothers him from time to time. Holden's talking out loud to Allie shows that he has not come to terms with his brother's death or found any way of dealing with his death. He is full of feelings of guilt and depression because he has not dealt with Allie's death and his won regrets about their relationship.

Finally, as well as dealing with getting kicked out of school and his brothers death, Holden also is struggling to understand the concept of growing up and dealing with the adult world. He tells his sister,

I keep picturing all these little kids...Thousands of little kids, and nobody's around...except me. And I'm standing on the edge of some crazy cliff. What I have to do, I have to catch everybody if they start to go over the cliff--I mean if they're running and they don't look where they're going I