It All Starts At Age 3

Suppose a chore needs to be done around the house, and the kids offer to help out with it especially while they are still on the stage when they are dying to please mom and dad. Parents know that it may be fine for the kids to do some help; however parents usually feel quite impatient because they know that when kids put their hands on the job might turn out to be a three-hour project, not to mention the grand mess that would result--a preventable mess if the job was done by the parent alone. Indeed, doing household chores can be so much more facile to perform in the absence of any assistance from the little kids. Who has got the time anyway in this fast pace world of today for making projects longer than they need to be done?

Many parents normally underestimate the extent to which even very young children comprehend the most rudimentary aspects of responsibility. From what I generally observe with my friends who have children, parents are inclined to defer assignment of household chores to kids until they reach the age of 8 or 9, when they are anticipated to undertake fairly greater challenges on their own, such as homework assignments or voluntary household chores. While most of these parents grope about slowing down the rush of housekeeping by assigning small children, some feel awkward about letting the little ones help on chores in the house because of the worry that they would be depriving kids of time to enjoy childhood. Nevertheless, kids ought to have the opportunity to sense importance to the family because the need to be needed is fundamental to human nature.

Among the friends that I had in high school, I am one of the few who is fortunate enough to have been assigned a chore while I was very young, starting when I was about 3 or 4. Most of my friends who had not participated in household chores while they were kids either dropped out of school or did not have enough motivation to proceed to college. IQ is not even much of a determining factor, since some of these friends I am referring to were even smarter than I am. However, I had more discipline and sense of responsibility than they did. Some were even too unlucky to get hooked into drugs. My own experience seemingly presents a clear enough evidence to me--that early contribution to household chores is more important in one's success as an adult than any other thing, not even IQ. On the contrary, if kids did not start contributing to household chores until they reach adolescence, their experience apparently backfired, thereby imparting a detrimental influence on success as young adults.

While I tried to ponder the underlying meaning behind my generalization, I have realized that when young kids perceive as though their dad thinks that they are capable of carrying out simple household chores, it relays a very powerful message upon their consciousness: "Dad believes that I can do that, therefore I'm important." As far as I can recall my childhood, my parents were indeed very encouraging and it helped a lot in building up my healthy self-esteem and sense of self-worth now that I am a young adult.

Why start at the age of 3? From my observation with my nephews, the ability to communicate and to comprehend verbal instructions is more developed by the time kids reach the age of 3. Furthermore, three-year-olds are more capable in handling psychomotor tasks such as bringing used dishes to the washing area, or putting laundry into the laundry basket. They are also able to walk much more adeptly than when they were just 1 or 2 year-olds.

In my opinion, social responsibility encompasses the comprehension that one's behavior has the capacity to affect others, whether positively or negatively. From what I have learned from my psychology classes, it has been said that even infants are capable to grasp this rudimentary idea of responsibility. I think this is true because babies seem to learn at such an early stage of their life that his or her actions can render impact on others. For instance, when parents respond to a cry, the baby somehow learns that crying is the most effective way of getting what he or she wants--if the baby is hungry, crying will get him milk.

When kids reach the age of around 2, they start to get the hang of simple basic social rules that distinguish between what is considered right or wrong in society. The child's ability to abide by these rules will ultimately evolve into the child's ability to sense compassion. Much of it will certainly develop as a natural process. As young as 2 years of age, I have seen my nephews soothe the one in distress. At age