Love Essay

Love

  "Love" a word easy to spell, difficult to define and impossible to live without it.  Love has several related, but distinct meanings depending on the context.  It is can be used to describe a plethora of issues like feelings, emotions, attraction, attachments, kindness, compassion, affection, friendship and romance. Humans express love by their actions and experienced love through feeling. The exact definition of love can be gotten only in a particular context. Most attempts to give a general definition to love only make it elusive. This paper is about my fascination in defining love from different perspectives.

     The origin of love dated some 1.8 million years ago (Fuentes 2002). Love evolved out of human need to bond with one another so as to facilitate survival and reproduction (Buss 1988a; Fisher 1998). The ability of humans to survive and thrive is made possible by being attached to one another. Bowlby in 1982 reported that love leads to increase survival.

     Different definitions exist for love. In simple terms, love can be seen as a general expression of a positive sentiment. An insight definition of love is feelings, attitudes and states that range from affection to pleasure. Fisher in 1992 defined love as an emotion with a powerful influence in many areas of life. The Merriam Web Dictionary defines love as a virtue representing human kindness, compassion and affection; a loyal and benevolent concern for others. Many other definitions exist for love depending on the context.

     Different aspects of love can be classified by determining the opposite of love. Love is an expression of positive sentiment when contrasted with hate or apathy. When contrasted with lust, love is an emotional, intimate form of romantic attachment. Furthermore, love is an interpersonal relationship when contrasted with friendship.

     People express love in different ways. The Ancient Greeks group love into four terms that symbolized the different types of love. These include eros, storge, agape, and philia. Agape is an unconditional love that that accepts people based on whom they are regardless of their shortcomings (Lewis 70). Agape love involves sacrificing for others without expecting any reward.  Philia is the bond existing between people who share similar interest (Hooper 654). Philia love just like agape is unconditional and is free from physical desire.  Storge is unconditional love shared among family members and friends.  Eros is love that arouses romantic feelings, emotions and sex.  Unlike the other three kinds of love that focus on others, eros focuses more on self than on others. People break up erotic relationships when feeling unsatisfied. Lewis S. Clive after exploring sexual activity and its spiritual significance reported that eros is an indifferent natural force which could result in evil as well as good (124).

     Love can be impersonal or interpersonal. Impersonal love is the love for objects, principles or goals. Examples of impersonal love include the love for pets, certain objects, and compassionate outreach. On the other hand, interpersonal love exists between people. Interpersonal love is closely related to interpersonal relationships (Erich 2000). Examples of interpersonal love include sexual relationships among people, friendship and love among family members.

     Sternberg in 1986 conceptualized love in terms of intimacy, passion, and decision. The intimacy component is emotional and involves feelings of warmth and fondness in the relationship.  The passion component of love consists of the drive involved in romantic, physical attraction, and sex while the decision component is largely cognitive and represents a decision to love someone and maintain the love.