Love...Never Having To Say Your Sorry

"Love Means Never Having to Say You're Sorry."

Essay #3 Draft - Nicole

My childhood years were very lonely at times, for I did not have any siblings to play with. I spent most of my time with my maternal grandparents. We always lived close enough to my grandparents that I could walk to their house on a daily basis.

When I was four years old my grandparents moved away to Florida. I spent my summers and most major holidays with them in Florida. I went every summer like clockwork. Days after school let out I would be on an airplane flying into the Tampa airport. My summers turned into great adventures traveling and site seeing many places. I always felt so loved and secure when I was with my grandfather. He was more like the father that I never had. When my grandfather and I were together we were inseparable day or night. My only mental memories as a child are with my grandfather. My childhood was truly lived when I was with him. I was my grandfather's "Little Angel".

Things changed when I became a teenager. My last summer visit with him was when I was 15 years old. When I was sixteen, the engine in my car blew up. I did not have the money to buy another car, so I asked my grandfather if I could borrow some money. My grandfather said that he would "loan" me the money, but I would have to pay him back. I agreed to the terms and took the money with no hesitation; needless to say, I never paid him back. When I did not pay back my grandfather for the car loan he was very disappointed. My reneging on the deal closed a door on the relationship between my grandfather and I. One that I would never open again.

My grandfather became very sick with emphysema and struggled with the sickness for 6 years, so much that at times he would be holding onto life by a machine and had tubs breathing for him. He was always such a strong man emotionally and physically that seeing him in this condition saddened me. I knew that his life here on earth would soon be ending, so I managed to visit a few more times, not near as many as I should have. Life had dealt me a few wild cards and I felt as though I had let my grandfather down. I was ashamed. Visiting with my grandfather was always a constant reminder of my mistakes in life. I