Millennials

Laurie Buckley

Professor Bazzell

COM 121-1121

30 September 2016

Millennials

        I am a millennial, born and raised in Exeter, Pennsylvania.  I became a mother at the young age of seventeen but still persevered.  I believe there are no limits on one’s abilities besides what they place upon themselves.  Anything can be accomplished if he or she applies the mind and effort to it.  My generation is full of independent young men and women.  Members are learning life is not something to be taken for granted but must be worked hard for.  Along with our hard work, comes a know-it-all attitude.  Although everyone in the group has a different background, we all create a strong support system through each other, knowing not one of us has had it easy.  I, with most members of my generation, battle obstacles and statistics to make a place in life for our families.  The impact of my parent’s divorce, having my son, and learning to drive made me a better person because it indicates I put others before myself, had to grow up quickly, and became more independent, which are traits characterizing this generation.

When my parents got a divorce, I learned to put others before myself which made me a better person.  As a young girl entering middle school, I had a whole family when the majority of peers did not.  Of course we had our problems, but every family does.  I was proud to say my parents were still married, even if it was not a happy family, to the outside world, we were, and my brother, sister, and I were not forced to take sides.  My sister had just moved out and my brother was becoming an independent sixteen-year-old.  Suddenly one night when I was about twelve years old, I remember waking up to a loud argument, which was common but seemed to be different.  Everything became quiet after a while and my mom appeared at my door.  I remember only hearing the first sentence before everything faded away into tears, sitting in my bed cradled in my mom’s arms, for the last time I felt like a child.  I remember trying to memorize the smell of her perfume, not knowing when the next time I would be this close to her again.  I tried so hard to calm down and listen to her voice, savoring her every word, remembering how I used to take these moments for granted.  I was a baby suddenly being awoken into adulthood.  After a couple months of processing, I realized this is how many people my age feel about their own families, and it never gets spoken about.  I learned to become an ear for others to vent to or a shoulder for others to cry on.  I put others’ feelings before my own in an attempt to mask my own emotions.  I did not want to talk about my experience but somehow listening to others vent made me feel like I was releasing tension also.  My middle school guidance counselor tried continuously to call me to his office.  He thought forcing me to talk would allow me to overcome my emotions. Going through this traumatic experience made me not as self-centered and allowed me a wider view of reality.  Before the divorce, I had lived in a fairy tale world full of happy endings.  Afterwards, I realized that is not reality, and people are able to overcome tragedies.  In my generation, and the generation leading up to mine, divorce is a major issue.  My parents attempted to stay together until my siblings and I turned eighteen and were on our own.  Lasting as long as they did is a rare situation.  This is an era of throwing away or replacing what is broken rather than repairing the problem.  Divorce is an easy fix to a usually rushed choice.  People always change and the ‘honeymoon faze’ ends leaving couples in a loveless marriage with completely different worldly views, unable to compromise for one another.  I was proud to be one of the few still intact.  I knew my family had issues, but I always believed we would work past it rather than ending it.

Giving birth to my first child forced me to grow up quickly but also improved my quality of human behavior.  In case high school is not difficult enough for most students, I decided to up my challenge.  When I was seventeen and in my junior year of school, I became pregnant with my first child, a baby boy.  He is the light of my life, but he was also a major burden.  Late July, before my senior year, I gave birth to a healthy baby who instantly deprived me of sleep, murdered my social life, and emptied my bank account.  None of that mattered, however, because he made up for any hole in my life.  Only two short months of his life, my schooling career began again and working shortly after that.  Child care was the most difficult aspect of the situation.  I had many helpers and went to some desperate measures simply to go to school or work.  I took for granted all the people around me who helped me.  A lady at church would come pick up my son and drive me and him around without asking for anything in return.  I lived with my mom, so she would take him for me whenever she wasn’t working.  His father was in the picture but only on the sidelines.  I looked towards the future and saw my son needing me, pushing me to make the best life possible for him.  My social life down-sized to only the adults parenting other children my son’s age.  I had to change my thinking from teenager to full grown adult in order to have conversations and even make friends with these parents.  High schoolers are self-centered a lot of times, thinking they know everything.  Becoming in charge of another life is a sobering reality.  Although he was a blessing, my son showed me I was not the center of the universe.  I had to change my lifestyle, setting aside minute objects to provide for his basic needs.  All my income went towards him, he shifted my focus to not be so greedy.  Babies take a lot of time and energy, more than I had.  Now I am able to look around at my world and not take things for granted as I had before.  I had unlimited support and love shown towards me through my tough time, I now feel obligated to spread it back into society.  Becoming a young mom is becoming common.  Kids become reckless and believe they are invincible until the inevitable happens to them, and young people mature seemingly overnight.  Around the time my son was born, I can name at least ten others my age becoming mothers.  High schools are bringing in counselors to discuss options and explain future life.  Some schools are even going to the extreme of incorporating daycares into their facilities to allow these students to continue their path to graduation.