Nothing

Well nothing much really... I've been so busy this couple of weeks... there are tons of works at school... tons of works at home and tons of work in my sideline... but I am not complaining or anything... hehe I like it when I got my first payment... though it wasn't big, still... I got money that came from my own sweat... it feels good when at last I have achieved something... I gave my entire wage to my mother... it really feels good... I feel proud of myself... I can't even stop smiling that day... I got a job... cool... I have done something that they can be proud of me... that I have a talent at all beside from being a knuckle head and prying to other peoples business... yeah someone out there will react to this part... don't be mad I'm not making myself low in here... its just that sometimes I do feel like shit all and that... I want to play basketball again to put my mind off of things specially that one particular thing... I just wish that one of these days it will just be gone like the wind and I don't have to feel it anymore...but still... up to now it kills me.... Cry? Yeah I wanted to do that... every freaking day.... But I just can't.... what for right? It would be just for nothing anyway... you see I have this so strong image that my friends see in me everyday... that I don't give a damn about problems... just go with flow... damn... I'm tired of wearing a faÐ*ade...can't I just take it off? But what would happen after that? I guess that will be the time that they will look down on me... Can I just don't care at all if that happened? I don't know... I am so lost right now...