Personal Accounts

A man stands outside of a small, cramped tent and gazes out at the thousands of men strewn across the camp. He has lines of worry etched into his face and has a wary stance that speaks of long days and sleepless nights. A pen is in his hands and a written letter on his lap. This letter is to be what he will be remembered for, not for his honorable fighting in battle, but for his last letter to his wife. Major Sullivan Ballou was a soldier in the United States Army and he wrote a goodbye letter to his wife, which he would later be famous for, during the Civil War. Theodore Upson wrote a journal entry of another account of the Civil War, it was of the reactions of his family after they learned of the attack on Fort Sumter. Upson's journal entry from "The Blue and the Gray: The Story of the Civil War as Told by Participants" and Ballou's letter to his wife are similar in expressing concern for family members, tone, and foresight, but they differ in emotional responses, time frames, and purposes.

Theodore Upson's journal entry is similar to Major Sullivan Ballou's letter because each of the accounts expresses concern for family members. Ballou's letter conveys his worry for his wife by asking her not to mourn for his death because he wants her to live life happily; he tries to make sure she finds closure. Upson also talks about how he and his family are concerned for their family members in the South. When his grandmother learned of the news of the attack on Fort Sumter she began crying and said "'... Oh to think that I should have lived to see the day when Brother should rise against Brother'" (Upson 441). Ballou and Upson clearly exhibit concern for their loved ones in their writings. Secondly, Ballou and Upson share a similarity of a sad tone in their pieces. Upson's parents and grandmother are greatly disturbed by the news of Fort Sumter being overtaken because they know that it means war has begun. Upson has family, the Hayes, that live in the South and Upson's household knows that the Hayes will not come to live with them away from the battle because their home is in the south and there they will stay; therefore making Upson and his parents bitter. Ballou's letter to his wife is full of sadness because he believes that he will die and is writing goodbye. He tells her "... and when my last breath escapes me on the battlefield, it will whisper your name" (Ballou 443). Ballou conveys to his wife, the woman he loves, his final goodbye and asks for forgiveness of his past behavior. Lastly, the foresight of inevitable death of loved ones or of oneself is something else that Upson and Ballou share in their accounts. Upson and his family foresaw the death of their family in the South and Ballou foresaw the death of himself. When Upson's grandmother was told of the news of Fort Sumter she said, "'Now they will suffer! God knows how they will suffer! I knew it would come'" (Upson 441). She did not have the ability to truly know if anyone would die, but she felt that there was no hope to save her family, the Hayes. Ballou writes his letter to his wife as if he was already dead and tells her, "... never forget how much I love you...'" (Ballou 443). There is no way possible for him to have known that he would die, but, never the less, he sends her a goodbye letter. During the Civil War, death was everywhere and these two authors were just one of many to fear and predict the death of family and/or of themselves.

Theodore Upson's journal entry differs from Major Sullivan Ballou's letter because they have contradistinctive emotional responses. When Upson's family learned of the news of Fort Sumter, they were frantic with worry for their family in the South. They were trying to figure out any possible way to bring