Personal Narrative Tragic Memory

Leiasia Hailey

Oct 3, 2016

Personal Narrative  

Bye Daddy.

“You gotta go! All the shit you put me and my kids through we don't deserve that, but that other bitch and your other kids oh yeah a perfect match” -Mami

“Jay get outta here with all that bull shit if that's what you want so be it, but my kids gonna always love their  daddy. You goofy as hell if you thought  anything different”.-daddy

That was the conversation I heard as I approached  the steps of my house. 2410 Stair street a two family flat in the heart of southwest “Mexicantown” Detroit. I knew I would be walking into a crossfire.  I  looked at the steps they seemed to look like the steps off  Disney's  Alice  in Wonderland. As I walked up those steps, my heart  seemed to beat  3× faster each step I went up.  The conversation  grew louder and more clear. My eyes started to water but I knew not to let one tear fall. Mami always said “crying not gone do nothing for you but make other people hurt you more”. Finally,  I made it to the top of the steps and pushed open the door.

I knew exactly  what to look for. If they had been fighting physically the house would have been a mess, family  photos on the floor, vases shattered, and clothes his or hers  all over the place in the house. Now, if they were fighting verbally everything  would seem calm but like the quiet  storm the thunder would soon roll. I wanted to believe  that my ears were playing tricks on me, that Mami wasn't so angry, and that daddy wouldn't leave .

Little did I know that day was the last time my daddy  would ever live in the same house as Dasia, jr, Mami, and I.

Usually Mami would greet me with a kiss on my cheek. She used  to kiss me all the time, but that was before when she was sweet. She told me to go check on Dada and jr and to sit with them while she finished talking to  aunt Betty on the phone.Aunt Betty was daddy's  oldest, and only sister. I didn't see daddy but I smelled cigarettes  so  I knew he couldn't be  far. I went into jr room Dasia and him were playing this V- tech  games system they were having so much fun. I smiled at them a kissed them. I asked “are Yall ok?” Dasia said “yup I'm beating jr again”. The fact that their minds hadn't  grasp  that daddy could possibly  be leaving forever made me worry. Who was going to tell them? How are they  going to feel? Will they cry or act out? Will they forget him? So much filled my 8 year old head. Gramma tells me to this day “you keep on worrying  if you want , but when your head explode we not going to Children's.” how much I wished she could have been there.

After checking on the kids I just had to find my daddy to check him. See his face even. I snuck  passed my Mami’s cracked bedroom door to the bathroom. I stood in the threshold  of the door. There was my daddy sitting on the toilet  seat holding his head as if he was praying to Allah, smoking a cigarette. I tapped his bald ,sweaty head, and said hey. He lifted head and smiled at me he said “wassup baby”. I said “nothing, what's up with you?”. He looked back down and then kissed me on the forehead. “We gotta talk about some  things leek” my daddy  rarely  ever was serious. He was a silly daddy, he was the daddy that made you laugh  while you were getting your  hair braided by mami, the daddy who cracked jokes on Mami, and played dress up. Even though  they were arguing  he would still Crack a joke here and there ,but this time it was different. He was serious ands a heart attack, and I wasn't ready to talk to daddy seriously. I just wanted to laugh with him, joke with him, and Forget about  seriousness. I knew that wasn't  even  slightly   possible.

I walked in the bathroom and sat on the rim of the tub. I had  already prepared  myself for disappointment, expecting the absolute  worst outcome. Now, that I think about it , I wonder if I had been more positive  would the outcome have changed, would my daddy still be in my life if I had only been more optimistic?  There I go again worrying myself. I swung my feet back and forth until he finally said “Look it's some shit that daddy did that he can't take back.” “Now I've  apologized  to Mami but that ain't  enough.” “I love Yall mami  too but we can't live with together no more.” “I gotta go live with auntie for a while, but I'm gone still see you and I will always love you.”