What Do I Miss?

It's early Sunday evening and I can smell the roast beef in the oven, the delightful aroma is just one thing that reminds me of Ð''blighty'. To be fair to this lovely Island, there are not too many things that I really do miss. I could list a few fantastic retail outlets but by and large my husband and I are pretty settled here and do not have cravings to return to the land of our birth, much preferring the land of ourÐ''re-birth'. That is until this weekend!.............

Only a couple of weeks ago we had the pleasure (???) of our 19 and 11month old daughter staying with us. We had earlier on in the year purchased her a ticket for the Ð''V' concert this weekend. (For the uninitiated the Ð''V' is for Virgin). One morning, we were greeted with Ð''God' Mum, I really must talk to you, something is really worrying me'. Ð''Thank you God! an earth shattering, thought provoking discussion awaits, anything to abate the taste of another regurgitated, transparently plagiarised article on the Ð''Proprieties of Olive Oil' (Wasn't she Popeye's other half???) whilst waiting for the kettle to boilÐ'..... Initial thoughts ranged from, Ð''oh God, please don't let that small pimple on her face have turned into Vesuvius overnight', to, she needs comforting over her row with the Ð''must have accessory' for her ageÐ'...Ð'... the boyfriend. Hell no, much worse than thatÐ'...Ð'..... It's Ð''how am I going to cope at Ð''V'??

Ð''WHAT'??? cope with what??? Having a fantastic time, camping out with the Ð''must have accessory'? seeing the line up that I would kill for??? Becoming, as my beloved calls Ð''one of the great unwashed'? Honey you haven't lived.

Ð''So what really is the problem here'? We both ask in utter jaw dropping amazementÐ'...Ð'...Ð'...Ð'...Ð'...

Ð''Well, to start withÐ'...Ð'...Ð'...Ð'...Ð'....., (What do you mean to start with????) I don't know what to take to wear. How can I make my kick-start 6 cups of Earl Gray before I cease growling and take on a near human form? Where will I keep my contact lenses? How many loo rolls will I need? And, How the hell and I going to put my makeup on in the morning without the Ð''must have accessory' seeing my face stark bollock naked??? And I thought I had taught her well in the practice of the 3 way thong???

How appropriate that her first major concert should be Ð''V'!!! Now I was transported back in time, reminiscing about all the fantastic concerts I had been to pre and aprÐ"Ёs uni days and God, how I wished I was going to Ð''V'. In fact, how I wished that I was going to any really good, ear splitting, adrenaline pumping, get up and dance CONCERTÐ'...Ð'...Ð'..... Yes, I know we have just been blessed (?) with Diana Ross, and even better, Bonnie Tyler, but could someone please ring U2, Scissor Sisters, Coldplay, Chemical Bros, and tell them that there is this Island, that has recently joined the EU and would kiss their asses if only they would bless us with their music in live CONCERT form?????

So, back to the kitchen table, and the plethora of sound advice bestowed on the virgin camper and concert goer!!

Firstly,