Classification Division Essay

Classification/Division Essay

Outcomes of Divorce on Children: Infants to Adults

Divorce is a terrible tragedy for children of any age to face. No matter what the reason.

There will be great losses suffered. This is very evident in our society. There are hundreds and hundreds of books written on this subject. Different age groups will face different problems and emotions. We will be looking at the affects on infants and toddlers, preschoolers, school- aged children, adolescents and adults.

Infants and Toddlers:

Infants and toddlers can not put what they are feeling into words. They do, however, recognize that something is not right. Parents may often feel angry or stressed with the spouse, not even realizing it has an impact on their young children. As a result, infants may cry a lot or it may affect their sleep patterns. They are frightened of the uncertainty going on around them. Toddlers may express it more by throwing more temper tantrums than usual or by being aggressive towards other children. They will have mood swings and may regress in some areas. Both infants and toddlers need the security of a routine. They feel safe in knowing what is coming next. It is very important that parents realize this and try to keep some sense of normalcy during this stressful crisis. Otherwise, it can lead to attachment problems later in life.

Preschoolers:

Preschoolers can minimally verbalize some of the conflict they are feeling. This is the age group that often blames themselves for what is happening. Children this age fantasize about replacing their mother or father. They are in love with the parent of the opposite sex. They may secretly wish for one parent to go away so that they may replace them. When one parent actually leaves, they feel extreme guilt. They also carry the fear of being abandoned. They see one parent leave them and think maybe the other parent is going to leave too. This is typical egocentric thinking for children of this age group. Children may express these feelings in various ways. They may become super clingy, regress in toilet training (wanting to have some type of control in the situation), or over dramatize their emotions. Parents need to be aware of these symptoms and reassure their children that they are loved and are not to blame for the divorce. Failure to do this may result in self-image problems and attachment disorders.

School-aged Children:

School-aged children seem to suffer the most during this life long tragedy. They tend to internalize their emotions. They have a strong bond with each parent. Both parents give them a sense of who they are and losing one of their parents is like losing a part of their identity. Because of this bond, school- aged children often try to fix things between their parents. They may believe that if they behave especially well, their parents will reunite and everyone will live happily ever after. This